Time to Return to Surgery

Written from the hammock


Could I do it? Could I love James enough to truly connect and support him through surgery, but not too much so I couldn't bare to see the pain? Surgery again was not my choice but God's choice for me and He was with us. 

I did not want to spend any more time than was needed in the operating room, so I decided to go to the surgery ward to wait with James until they came to get him. He was in a ward with four other men. It became a little awkward when they began to sponge bathe everyone. I excused myself to the porch right outside James's window. Once he had been cleaned up he moved the curtain so he could see me. He then opened the window so I could hand him my iPhone and he could play games. When he would get stuck he would pass it back out to me. We continued to watch each other play through the window for over an hour, before I came back in the room. 

Eventually they came to get James for his surgery. At first when I mentioned I was going to go to surgery with James I was told I couldn't. The nurse explained I was part of the mission team with Dr. Glenn. I felt like a bit of a fraud but was thankful to have Glenn on my team. My mom instincts were feeling pretty strong and I was determined I would be with this young man when he had surgery. I had promised James and his grandmother I would do this. The nurse took me down to the operating theater where I put on my scrubs and found James on a stretcher in the hallway outside the operating room. I was able to hold his hand as he got his spinal and talk with him throughout his surgery. I watched for him so he would not have to watch. When he asked to see what they were doing I told him what was happening and assured him he did not want to see. The electric drill was broken so they had to use a hand drill. 14-year-old boys have really hard bones. They put in a plate and six screws which should help his leg heal correctly.


It was an honor and a privilege for me to journey with James. After lunch Sheryl and I found James asleep in his room, so she gave me a tour of the new PT wing of the hospital, and the maternity ward. 

When we returned to his room he was awake and in excruciating pain. After my third try someone came in to give him some pain medication. Just before dinner Carolyn, Dr. Glenn and myself went back to check on him. You can't imagine how thankful I was to have Glenn looking in on my new friend.


I had so resisted my first day in surgery but God had a plan for me and I was richly blessed. Last night I downloaded and played Temple Ron on my phone and thought of James. I was blessed to serve Him in Africa.

Sunday Worship with Mama Grace's Family

Written from the hammock


Saturday night Jim told us that two of us could go to worship with Mama Grace and her family on Sunday. It would be about a 30 min. ride. The rest of the team would worship locally with the other two Joy home families. Liza and I were the lucky two to go. Sunday morning a car arrived to pick us up. Mama Grace, Liza, myself and the kids piled in. We drove a short way down a rugged road then we stopped. By mistake one of mama Grace's children had gone with the other families to the local church and we stopped to pick him up. It reminded me of losing track of my own children when they were little and I only had four to account for not seven. Now we were all together and on our way.

As we drove I thought about how important a faith community can be in your life. I was really thankful that mama Grace could continue to worship with her faith community. As we arrived at church this community of believers seemed to love and nourish these children from the Joy home and also supported Grace in her calling as their mom. 

I felt like a mother hen during worship with one chick under each wing. What a blessing to put my arm around and love these two beautiful children who've experienced so much hardship in their short lives. We sat in front of Ruth's (Ruth oversees the Joy Home) husband and children who made me feel so welcome. What a privilege it was to worship with this faith community. After worship Liza and I were invited into the pastor's office for tea. His desk was covered with snacks that we shared as we visited with him, his wife and Ruth's mother. I was blessed to experience so much of the love of Christ while I was in Africa.

Ruth

A Home of Joy

A new day, a new experience. Today we headed to the Joy Home an orphanage supported by Tree of Lives and Nazareth Hospital. As people from Tree of Lives and others were praying for a way to help orphans a woman was praying for a way to tell her family she wanted to give away her home, to help needy children. When the two visions intersected Joy Home was born. We were blessed to share the hours of two days with these beautiful children and their three moms. 


We ate together played together and read books. I also was blessed to work in the kitchen peeling potatoes and green bananas. Becky, Cheryl and I were quite the team. A nick or two with a knife was no problem among friends. You should have seen the size of the knives. I did extremely well considering knife safety isn't my strong suit.

Refreshed and Renewed

I woke up refreshed and renewed this morning. Last night during devotions I shared my Friday reflections. It was really hard but I felt it was something I needed to do to make the process complete. I feel like I have some new understandings deep in my soul.

Where Do I Go From Here, Lord?

I was scheduled for pastoral counseling this morning but I opted out. I didn’t know which would be harder to sit with another in their pool of tears or to sit by myself in my own pool of tears.

Why, Lord? Why does it have to be so hard for some people? Why does it have to be like this? Why does the boy in my group have to go three days without food? Why do children have to walk five hours to get dirty water? Why do we beat one another? Why are young girls raped more than once? Why do people go to bed cold and hungry? Why, Lord, why? How does my life contribute to these hardships?

Will sitting in my own pool of tears make any difference in the world? What is my purpose in this world? We are only here on this earth for such a short time. Lord, you know I try to be faithful, I try to make a difference. But the hurts of the world are so big and I am so insignificant. The hurt and pain and struggling is not only in Africa but also in my own back yard.

Where do I go from here, Lord? Do I have a new name? Have I been emptied so you can fill me, so that I can continue to serve you?

As I pray for the women from our home visits, I know their deep faith sustains them. Then I wish I had their faith. As I contemplate that and remember, I think maybe I do have their faith. I remember when my mom was dying of cancer, when Amber was suspected to have hydrocephalus, a brain tumor, diabetes, or possibly a degenerative neurological disease. I remember and my faith sustained me. Our circumstances are different but our stories are similar. A faith that sustains through the challenges of life.

Philippians 4:12 I have found the recipe for being happy whether full or hungry, hands full or hands empty. Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in the One who makes me who I am. I don’t mean that your help didn’t mean a lot to me – it did. It was a beautiful thing that you came alongside me in my troubles. You Philippians well know and can be sure I will never forget.

My day has been full and I have been blessed. An angel offered to help me find James the 14-year-old boy in the hospital who broke his leg. He was in the surgical ward with several older men. He was so glad to see us, as he was terminally bored. We helped him get into a wheel chair and went out to the courtyard with him. After a short conversation I asked if he liked to play cards. He shared that he didn’t like cards but he did like computers. A light went off and I pulled out my iPhone. We spent a couple of hours together trying to get the car out of the traffic jam. I had been emptied but now I was full.

The Library

Before I left for Africa I had a wonderful conversation with Don and Cheryll about the many people I would meet and the things I would experience. They especially wanted me to greet Alice the librarian. They explained she was positive and that she had a wonderful spirit.

From the hammock:
Since I had brought 100 pounds of children's books, I was assigned to help organize the library.  As a few from the team discussed how we might organize the books, my inner self quietly screamed "but what about Alice, what does she think?". My image of Alice and the library was that she was tall slender and in her mid-20s. I had seen some pictures of the library and knew it was a bright beautiful room. I thought there was already a system and many books. In reality Alice was a beautiful young girl who had taken responsibility for a collection of books Don and Cheryll had brought on a previous mission trip and had naturally been appointed librarian, when the space for a library became available. While Alice was in school we organized, shelved and put cards in the books. The first time the library was open with the new books, many children stopped by after school and we had an impromptu storytime. I am confident that Alice has done whatever was needed to re-organize the library to meet the needs of her constituents. I indeed was blessed to meet Alice and the children who come to her library.

A letter from Alice


Dear Sylvia and Bill,
I hope you are very healthy as I am here. Greet everyone at your home. I was happy when the books were brought in my library I could not even image that is my library. In those books there was the one I loved most and it name is the snowman mystery when I read it I find good tenses in the book.


I would like you come here in Nazareth one day one time. We like our country because it the one that God gave us to live there.


If you have a child please don't forget to come with him/her I will be very excited. I love you.

Your lovely
Alice

Feelings

Today my assignment was to help with art therapy at the Alamano school, but as I went to bed James the young boy with a broken leg was on my mind. He was scheduled for surgery today. I didn't want him to go to surgery without a mom, so I asked Becky if I could switch to surgery. I showed up at surgery with a bit of fear and trepidation not knowing what I would experience. As I waited for scrubs I saw Dr. James and explained I was there to support the patient James. He told me James would not be having surgery until Monday. Somewhat relieved I headed for art therapy. My favorite part was talking with five young boys about feelings. I handed out a feeling card to everyone and then we took turns telling a story about when we had felt that way. 

Some of the stories I heard…

I was tired 

when I didn't eat for three days

when I walked to Limuru (we took a taxi and bus there yesterday)

when I walked five hours to fetch water

I was sad 

when the man hit me

the boy kicked me

the boy threw stones

I was happy 

when I got a quilt

new shoes

bread to eat

a soda

a sweater and shorts

I was surprised 

when I was number one in my class

A Post for the Tree of Lives Blog

Matthew 11:28-30

The Message (MSG)

 ^28-30"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."

I walked with Jesus today. We visited the town of Limuru and the villages of Karanjee, Miseri and Farmers. I wish you could've sat on my shoulder to hear the stories of the four women who are HIV-positive. 


They have been positive for many years but because of the support they get from the Tree of Lives ministry they are leading healthy lives. One woman shared how her diagnosis has brought her closer to God and her faith community. Another with medications and education was able to have an eight-month-old baby who is negative. 


The other two women in addition to HIV meds also receive food supplements to help them maintain their health. It was a powerful testimony to how sharing our resources can have a profound impact on the precious life of another human being. 

I am so grateful to Anne and the community worker we journeyed with today, for they are the hands and feet of Christ. I was humbled and honored to walk with them. Won't you consider giving a donation to Tree of Lives today, so you too can walk with Jesus in this corner of His world?

A Blog for Tree of Lives #1

The first blog entry for our trip was read tonight. It was written by Sheryl and was so eloquent. At the end jokingly we were told if we didn't write a blog entry we would go to hell. Hence my blog entry number one.


I'm writing this blog entry because I do not want to be the only one from this group going to hell, because I did not write. These people from Norfolk aren't half bad so I think I could stand them for eternity. I will say the blog entries I have read that others wrote totally intimidate me, but the threat of hell is a strong motivator. I pray the Holy Spirit would give me words to write an adequate entry if not at least it wasn't me.

Define Poverty

 Each night after dinner we would gather for devotions, sharing and prayer. Jim's question for us Wednesday night was to define "poverty".  Here is my definition.

Poverty of wealth- not having enough to sustain a healthy life

Poverty of faith-having too much to sustain a healthy faith

Stretching My Envelope

The Lord will keep you from all harm - He will watch over your life; the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and for ever more. Psalm 121:7-8

God is stretching my envelope a little each day. Today Amber and I were scheduled to do home visits to clients who were positive. We met and the social worker we would be with at the clinic. I am a pretty calm person, but new experiences in another culture can test my belief in Psalm 121. My biggest concern was the matatu (small bus) ride as I remembered Nikki's friend Juliet who had lost 10 family members in a matatu accident in Zimbabwe. The Lord did watch over us and I was richly blessed by my experience. All the clients we visited were women with deep faith. They shared their faith with us, which was a real blessing.  I wish every person from Tree of Live's faith community could've sat on my shoulder as we visited the HIV-positive women today. Words cannot express the difference you are making in their lives. I wish everyone from my church family could've been sitting on my shoulder today so they could see what a difference a faith community can make. One woman shared how testing positive had brought her closer to God and how supportive her church family had been. I am so grateful to Ann and the community worker who led us around as they are the hands and feet of Christ in the world. I was humbled and honored to walk with them.

I Am Not a Surgeon

My only picture from my day in surgery.  The other were over written.

Last night after devotions we got our assignments for the first day. I waited eagerly to hear what I would be doing. I was one of the last and I would be observing surgery. Of all the assignments that was the one I feared most. Could I do it? If I pass out when my child vomits what would I do in surgery? Then I remembered I had watched my own knee surgery, maybe I could do this. No matter what I was feeling I would not ask for a new assignment. The first surgery was a skin graft for Hannah who had a severe burn on her upper arm and breast. My heart went out to her, I felt so bad for her having heard how painful burns are. The surgeon Dr. James was looking at it from a different perspective, he was going to have her better in time for her upcoming wedding. I wrestle with being in surgery today. I have no medical skill, what could my presence offer? I prayed. Maybe I need to further redeemed my faith so I will believe in the power and value of prayer. This experience will take some more processing.

Overwhelmed Night One

Sister Phoebe greeted each of us at the airport with a bouquet of beautiful flowers. A piece of the puzzle. 

Somehow in my heart when I see something that is a piece of the puzzle I know it even if I don't know what it means. 

As I lay in bed last night the guilt of being in such a nice place melted away and my heart was filled with gratitude for how much God loves me. 

Of course all your life people tell you Jesus loves you but last night I knew in a way I have never known before. I was also filled with gratitude for a husband who willingly and lovingly encouraged me to go. 

What a blessing for me as a child of God and what a blessing for me as a mom to share this experience with my daughter.

What Do I Have to Offer?

Lord you have brought me to a safe place with loving people. The connection with Liza, sharing our stories another piece of the puzzle.


I wanted to see the hospital today but walking through with a group of white Americans made me feel uncomfortable. I tried to understand what it might be like if I was an African sick and not feeling well or a parent worried about my child. It reminded me of the discomfort I felt when we visited a man dying of cancer at a hospital in downtown Nairobi. Although Wellingtone shared how much it meant to have Americans visit and pray for him it is a concept that I can't fully comprehend. I think if I had medical skills and something to offer I would feel very different. But what do I have? Who am I? Is my personhood enough? Is another's personhood enough for me or do I always need something?


The lights just went off so I thought maybe God was saying that is enough reflection for your soul right now. So God what does it mean that they went back on before I finished my sentence?

A Journey To Heal My Faith and Restore My Soul

Last night when we arrived I was overwhelmed by the beauty of where we would be staying. As I watched Jim building a fire in the fireplace I felt a wave of guilt. This was our mission trip? About half the group had arrived. We talked, said grace, ate and talked some more. I mostly listened and observed trying to take in who these people were we would be spending the next two weeks with. As I turned down the blankets on my bed I had to smile as they were covered with little bear designs, somewhere in my heart I knew it was a piece of the puzzle.

A Visit with Friends

Most of my blog entries were written while I was in Africa but there were some important experiences I will share from my perch on the hammock in Connecticut.

The first four days after I returned from Africa were filled with catching up with family from across the US. Now I sit by myself by the lake wondering if God, Jesus and faith can be as real on this side of the ocean. I have been working on my pictures and will soon start to share my experience on my blog, I'm not sure why I'm sharing it except I am hoping it will help me connect more deeply with others who are trying to live a rich life of faith.

Our visit to Kenya began with two nights with Wellingtone and his family. My journey had brought me to his home on three previous trips to Africa. It was important to reconnect and introduce Amber to these wonderful friends and great ministry.


 On Saturday Amber and I went to the Anajali school where we met with the teachers and students who were using the assistive technology I had introduced. I was able to answer questions and provide support. 


We had packed the shawls, pictures and notes I had made for Godliver and her mom in our our backpack. What a wonderful God we have. Godliver's mom stopped by the school to pick up Godliver and I was able to give them their gifts. I had been worried about what to say. I didn't say much but I hope my words and my actions conveyed the love of Christ to them.

I taught Lionida everything I knew about knitting a prayer shawl.  It didn't take long.

I always come away blessed after worshiping with the Anajali community and was glad Amber had the chance to experience that with me.  I'm sorry I don't have many pictures to share as most of my first pictures got overwritten.


It was so good to see Wellingtone, his family, Millie, Patrick, Godliver, Mary Stella, Joel, the teachers, students and people at church. Although our time with them was short we were deeply blessed by our visit.